30 Days to Live

Now here's a thought that most of us will probably run away from: IF you only had 30 days to live, what would you change? What would you start doing immediately and what would you stop doing? What is defining your life? These are some of the questions we have been pondering at Restore Church ever since Easter. It's not such an easy thing to ponder, particularly for those of us who have had loved ones die over time, who knew their time was near.

Some years ago, a friend of ours, Steve, a very talented graphic artist, was diagnosed with esophageal cancer. And although he fought the good fight and after the first surgery and hardcore rounds of chemo and radiation, thought he had licked it. But that was not to be and although he went through another round of chemo, he finally decided to stop and enjoy the days he had left with this two young children and lovely wife. They did it right, I think. They planned, they traveled a little, and they stayed home together. They showed the world what they valued: their relationships with one another. 

Isn't it sad really to think that we have to wait for the eleventh hour before we act on this basic truth? 

Jesus lived this way. He lived with no regrets, leaving all that he had to those who remained. He completed his mission and left a legacy for the rest of us: Love God and love others. 

In reality, this kind of living is passionate and full of life. It's a circle that continue to empty and fill our souls. 

We have to remember the timelessness of God who knows know past or future, all is now. God does not operate in our time-centered dimension, which is why God is the same yesterday, today, and forever, the Alpha and Omega knows the beginning of the story as well as the end. God is in our future right now as Jesus is in my history and both are working toward the ultimate goal of sculpting a life worth living, not for my sake, but for the sake of those I touch, talk to, listen to, and yes, love. When I love on that level, I am serving . . . as Jesus served. 

This is a series of sermons worth hearing first hand. Check them out here: http://www.restorechurch.net/sermons/  

I need to ponder these things for a few more days. What would you change? 

 Irmgarde Brown
Blogger, Writer, Librarian,
Follower of Christ
Facebook: irm.brown
Twitter: IrmBrown 

Hosanna : Save Us

When I first entered into a life of faith, I was totally unaware of the religious norms of the day. By the luck of the draw, the man who introduced me to the mysteries of God attended a Pentecostal church on the east side of New York City. Go figure: beehive hairdo's and long black dresses. I was more than just a fish out of water; I felt like the Girl With the Dragon Tattoo... that's how different I was from that place.

And sure enough, within moments after my first service there (which was blessedly at 3 pm on Sunday afternoon), a well meaning person asked me if I was saved. Little did I know that this was the epitome of Christianese. I had no clue what the person was talking about but figured "yes" would be the safest bet.

I find it fascinating that people waved palm branches and laid cloaks out on the road when Jesus entered Jerusalem on that first day of Passover, which we now call Palm Sunday. And as he passed by, they cried out, "Hosanna, Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord." Hosanna means "save us."

"Save us!" They were looking for a deliverer, the one who would overcome Roman oppression; they were looking for a King, a warrior, a prophet, a divine solution to their troubles.

What about today? What do people think being saved means today?

We still call this Jesus, Savior. Despite the fact that Christ didn't save people the way they thought he would. There was no physical annihilation of oppression, just an overthrow within the Spirit.

When people talk about "saving" anyone at Restore Church, we're talking about coming along side folks who want a relationship with God, who want to hit the reset button.

A church is just one of the places we can give God the opportunity to Hosanna our hearts and souls. Loving and accepting people are the spine of a church. And together we rebuild dreams.

This is holy week. It's a time to seriously consider this Hosanna business. It's a time to consider the waving of palm branches within our souls as we struggle with the challenges of 21st century living, whether old or young, single or married, divorced or widowed. Hosanna!

Restore Church has been creating lots of contingencies for people to connect with God and with one another through small groups, introductory classes, volunteerism, and of course, through a number of worship services. This Easter, we will be celebrating God's answer to all of our Hosannas through the resurrection life that Easter represents, at the Havre de Grace location, Saturday night at 6 and Sunday morning at 9:00, 10:15, & 11:30 a.m. and at the new Perryville High School location, at 10:15. Or find another place, that's OK too. Call out to God, Hosanna, wherever you are. Ask! And God will answer.

 Irmgarde Brown
Blogger, Writer, Librarian,
Follower of Christ
Facebook: irm.brown
Twitter: IrmBrown

Crossing the River

Photo by Ed Rybczynski
Used by permission

This weekend and the first preview service at the Perryville campus, marks another turning point for Restore Church. How many turning points can a body of believers sustain? How could it be? What are we thinking? Is it even possible? How rash! How sudden! Will we all just crash and burn?

Or, will God's hand touch this crazy vision, reach across the river and simply, make it so?

The truth is, there aren't enough reasons not to try it. If God leads, we will succeed. It may not feel like the most reasonable expansion of a church only six months old and yet there's something right and good about this leap of faith. 

You see, our chairs are mostly full on the weekend. Even I, just a worker bee, can see our precious Ontario Street site is too small to meet the traffic. Initially, the Restore team had wanted a bigger venue in Havre de Grace. But just like Mary and Joseph walked from place to place in Bethlehem, looking for a suitable place, there was none. The buildings were full and occupied. And so, we landed in a humble "stable," our little country church that rocks with contemporary sound, edgy videos, tears and laughter as we walk through the scriptures and message with Jess Bousa each Sunday (and Saturday night).

It's a grand experiment.

I had a friend who used to teach 5th grade science and she would tell me how much she enjoyed setting up experiments for her kids and watching the wonder in their eyes as they interacted with chemicals and gravity and magnetism and so forth. I asked her, "you do a practice run-through of the experiment on your own, right? . . . to make sure it works?" And she laughed at me and said, "Absolutely not, we experience our successes and failures together. We learn!"

And so we do the same at Restore. We go, we work, we give, we volunteer, and we dream. We stumble and we fumble and we learn. We are just regular folks who follow the direction of our young leadership team and in exchange, they give their full energy to the work of God. Is it so much for us to throw in a little grace and prayer? Well, okay, a lot of prayer.

So, it's happening. It's another location and another opportunity to connect with people who want to meet God in their lives, to work out this thing called faith together, and to build meaningful relationships. Whether it's on the street or in a gym or in a country church, whether it's in Perryville or Havre de Grace or who knows where next, God can show up and manifest hope and joy.

This church, this irregular goofy House dedicated to Christ, this unfamiliar method of growing a collective is crossing a lot of rivers, not just the Susquehanna. We're crossing boundaries; we're crossing over the "shoulds" and the "shouldn'ts." Really, don't each of us need to make some of these crossings within our own souls: from despair to hope, from fear to trust, from betrayal to renewal? It's always a little dangerous to make such crossings. We might get wet.

 Irmgarde Brown
Blogger, Writer, Librarian,
Follower of Christ
Facebook: irm.brown
Twitter: IrmBrown

Draw a Circle

 I knew, when I saw the logo for Pastor Jess's current series, that it would be special. There was something about the boldness of the Circle Maker logo (which is actually the cover art for the book by Mark Batterson), that I would be entering a challenging set of weeks. And with week one, I have not been disappointed.

Of course, I've always been intrigued by the circle anyway. And it appears in religions and beliefs all over the world, from mandalas to labyrinths. The circle is used to represent the sacred and the cyclical. We can even see the circle in our various festivities like the Christmas wreath, as a circle, it goes back to the symbolism of eternity or eternal life.

But this particular circle is slightly different. The emphasis this week is on the idea of what is inside the circle and what is outside the circle. Both of these positions have messages for us.

The story of Honi, the circle drawer, is an ancient one: this old Jewish scholar was known for his bold faith, a faith that would sustain him as he prayed for rain when no rain fallen for a long time. He drew a circle around himself and would not leave that circle until it rained. He put his life within the lines. He started there.

But there is another way to think of the circle, and that is as walls that prevent entrance. In other words, like the old walls of Jericho. It is said that Joshua and his army marched around the walls of Jericho once each day for 6 days and then on the 7th day, they marched around it seven times, shouted and clamored and blew their horns. The wall fell. Whether this actually happened in history is not as important as its meaning.

It is yet another kind of bold faith that was built on a promise that Joshua heard from God. Let's say it happened just like that. What is message? Sometimes you have to be willing to look a little goofy to follow the promise, the vision, the dream. Sometimes you have to be willing to look outside the norm, to step past the 3-D interpretation of things, to have faith in the Spirit speaking within.

The most important steps are figuring out what our own Jericho walls might be and are we inside or outside the circle of them.

And then we pray.

 Irmgarde Brown
Blogger, Writer, Librarian,
Follower of Christ
Facebook: irm.brown
Twitter: IrmBrown

Dare You to Love

I've got to hand it to my pastor, Jess Bousa @ Restore Church last Sunday. He built a sermon on a passage that has beleaguered me for years, Ephesians 5:22-27. I have heard other teachers and ministers speak on it, but I am usually sitting there with my arms crossed and my mind closing with each sentence. I've heard it used too often to make women feel like doormats, or worse, to feel good about being one. No thanks.

For those of you who aren't familiar with this scripture, it begins this way, "Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands..." Now, if those aren't fighting words, what is? Of course, it depends on the perspective. And there's something else, it's even more dependent on the context. And for this reason, I listened. And I picked up something important.

I don't think it's my imagination. There's always tension in the room when pastors teach on this section of holy writ about marriage. Women hold their breath during the first part while men kind of nod their heads thinking that sounds fine. But then, the men get a little dose of it when Paul continues, two sentences later, to say, "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. . . " The emphasis is usually placed on the way Christ sacrificed Himself for the Church. Wives think to themselves, "Right, that'll be the day."

Neither of these responses is healthy or useful. I know. I've been there.

Here's what I learned. In any situation, until you get to the heart of the controversy or understand the root causes, everything else is symptomatic. Anger doesn't spring up from nowhere, it has been simmering for a while. How often is the emotional explosion unrelated to the real issue? Trouble in a marriage is the same way. It's not really about the underwear on the doorknob or the hair in the drain. It's in the mindset. And it's the centering of the heart--on God or on the spouse?

St. Paul's premise is simple, just like the rest of the Gospel message. But to find that simplicity, step back a little, to verse 21, "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ." (That's everybody, by the way, husbands, wives, children, grandparents, aunts, uncles, neighbors, colleagues, you name it.) This is one of those paradoxical explanations the Bible is famous for: if we serve one another, if we give up our "right to be right," if we respect one another, if we want the best for the other person, we'll all get along a lot better. It's the root of love.

In a marriage, it's harder to do because we're with that person a lot more, like 24/7. This is where the sacrificial part comes in. This is where the extra mile really manifests. This is where the Golden Rule gets a work out. And yes, this is also where the joy can be, the growing can be, the practice for working through love before we try it out there in the world with the enemies.

Take the dare. Go back to the basics: submit to one another, respect one another, serve one another.

Irmgarde Brown
Blogger, Writer, Librarian,
Follower of Christ
Facebook: irm.brown
Twitter: IrmBrown

Sex is a Hot Topic in Church

Doesn't happen very often, I'll say that! How many times have you heard a preacher talk about sex on a Sunday morning? Isn't that topic usually relegated to the youth group retreat?

But, sex is everywhere, for good or ill. The good of sex would ideally exist in a marriage or committed relationship while the not so good sex thrives in its flagrant display through the media, social networks (like Facebook and YouTube), and casual, one-nite stands between near strangers.

Sex is physical, yes. And as long as we all continue to think about it on a purely physical level, it will lose its power and deeper meanings. Sex without emotional investment or intentional spiritual bonding, is a debasement of its intended purpose. The trendy "friends with benefits" concept is simply a contemporary form of prostitution in which no money changes hands, just favors.

In my personal opinion, just as children who are sexually abused usually lose their ability to keep sexual activity within the bounds of propriety, within the context of love, within a monogamous promise, so do those who participate in casual sex just as 15-year olds (give or take years on that number) think they have discovered the golden goose. Instead, they disconnect the soul from the body.

How we "think" about sex will drive how we "act" out. If sex becomes a game where we indulge in "safe" sex, meaning we are sure we have birth control etc., then it's OK. Everyone is doing it after all. What's the big deal? Those are the myths perpetuated by our culture, for all ages.

But if the body is truly holy; if the body is sacred by the very presence of the Holy Spirit, then I'd say it is a big deal for real. We should not be trying to see how close we can get to the fire without being burned. Instead, we should be considering how close we can get to God.

The Hugh Hefners of this world have managed to convince us that the body is intended to cause desire/lust but instead of providing that desire as a banquet, we are shown the body as though it is a dumpster from which we are to sort through and find the food still fit to consume.

Like buying a used car, it comes with unintended or unknown issues as a result of its previous owners. A person who has chosen multiple sexual partners is carrying the remnants of those experiences with them. It's no longer just a test drive, it's a joy ride at the expense of the one.

It's up to each person to create and stand by sexual boundaries. If those boundaries are crossed, have a plan in mind. Sometimes, it means stepping away from the relationship altogether. No one should be guilt-tripped into having sex.

Sex in the 21st century is a time bomb. It's possible that God has a paradoxical choice in mind for us to navigate the complexities of sex. After all, if Jesus thought it made sense to "love our enemies" and "give our coat and even second coat to the poor" (leaving us in the cold), isn't it possible that sex might fall under a totally unexpected way as well? Is it possible that we've missed the real "Joy of Sex" by cheapening its practice?

Irmgarde Brown
Blogger, Writer, Librarian,
Follower of Christ
Facebook: irm.brown
Twitter: IrmBrown

Human Beings: "As is"

Here's the trick of making and keeping friends: start right where they are, "as is."

Despite approaching our thirtieth year of marriage, I still don't have all the answers for a successful marriage. But I do have one piece of advice for young couples who are contemplating that next step of tying the knot: "Can you look at one another right now and say to yourselves, if this person never changes, can I still love them?" Most of them say "yes" but I don't really believe it.

You see, too many people enter relationships with a secret agenda to "help" the other one along, to enlighten the other one, or to train them. I am no different. My husband had been a bachelor for so long that he was almost camping out even if it was in a house. He had two forks, two knives, two spoons; he had two sets of sheets and towels (one in use and the other in the laundry). He lived quite frugally, rode a bike to work, and naturally, had no debt (smart man). Needless to say, despite falling in love with the "as is" man, I thought he needed a little fine-tuning. Of course, he thought I needed a little help too. I mean, when I moved into that little Atlanta house, I had twice as much "stuff" as he did, a dog, two cats, and non-stop monologues. I was a tornado.

Who we really fell in love with was the person we imagined the other to become.

Unfortunately, this can happen in a church or other organization. We're waiting for the person follow the mold, to use the right language, to assimilate. If the person is "off" or not quite like us, we are hesitant to engage.

But the truth is, a real friend has three primary responsibilities (Jess Bousa shared these points last Sunday): help others overcome obstacles, stand in the gap where the other person is vulnerable, and simply, "do life" together. Marriage is the same really, isn't it?

We each encounter challenges in our lives, sometimes financial, sometime health, sometimes emotional. It's in those times that we need some sense of stability, a person or group of people who will provide strength or calm or flat out aid. In the Bible story of the 4 friends who not only carried the paralyzed man to the house where Jesus was teaching, only to find the crowd was too dense to get through, they immediately went to "Plan B" - go through the roof. [see Mark 2:1-5]

The paralyzed man was totally dependent on others. He was completely vulnerable. He chose to expose his vulnerabilities and the friends chose to embrace them. How often do we turn away from the weaknesses of others because they make us uncomfortable?

In my mind, life is hard. No one should have to navigate it alone. As Pastor Jess says, we need to "do life" together, work through the hard stuff, share the burdens, lighten the load.

I have a friend who had a radical mastectomy and all she could think about what how ugly she looked. Her personal shame was even greater than her pain. She feared that no one could accept her "as is" again. What she needed in that moment was to know that she was still beautiful to me. And she was. Eventually, time healed her body and her heart.

Every church needs both kinds of people, the ones still tied to the "mats of their vulnerabilities" and the ones who have learned ways to help carry them. It may entail that "extra mile."